Women and Power

Driving home tonight I was thinking about the fact that men throughout history typically exercise power through physical or direct methods.  I'm going to do some gross generalization here but women typically lack the chemistry or physiology to exert their force of will in the manner that men do.  This produces some interesting social interactions I've observed.

Don't get me wrong.  This by no means women are powerless in society.  Also throughout history there are famous women (Cleopatra for example) who have risen to the top by no accident.  Women have had to learn to get power through alternate means.  Means in the form of passive-aggressive and manipulative behavior.

I have observed this in various forms throughout my life.  It is pretty different in comparison to dealing with my dude friends.  Guys tend to be more direct.  If there is a disagreement they will fight or whatever then "hug it out, bitch".

It is a different story with women sometimes.  They like to bottle things up and then get you to guess what's wrong with them.  Instead of being mad at something that's not going well in their life they will transfer that anger to whomever they are talking to or people close to them.  Social engineering occurs frequently in packs of women.  This is necessary to establish a pecking order.

I have lots of female friends who buck this trend.  I feel sorry for them though because this must have been difficult to deal with growing up as you adjust to social norms within female social circles.  They just didn't play those games but I fear they might have paid the price for that along the journey of life.  And I can't blame the women who do play the game.  That is just how things are.  There is immense social pressure for men to act like men and women to act like women.  However that is.

As a guy this is a true pain in the ass to deal with sometimes.  I acknowledge that I have extra special ways of pissing off women myself.  But it seems like the more I get to know women the more I observe this type of behavior no matter how much I idealize my interactions with them.

Comments

Kate McHugh said…
Ok so first I'm SHOCKED no one else has commented on this...

Secondly, I found it interesting for a # of reasons.

1. Though woman do not exercise power necessarily the same as men do, we all have what in most cases trumps all men's powers... which (and I think this is a technical term) is the power of the pussy. Even looking at this from purely sexual imagery, men are the 'direct' organ, whereas woman are the 'recipient' passive ones. But therein also lies power - it's pretty impossible to replicate a woman (think - is the 'fleshlight' or some latex Jenna Jamison anywhere close to the same as a real one?) vs dildos, rabbits, etc. are physical 'sensation' wise pretty fair proxies... In a more social view, this is plainly obvious when it comes to men's typical annoyance that 'a woman can get laid, no problem (ie meet at a bar, etc.)
2. I think the differences in how women deal w people varies alot w the level of respect. Roommates is a great example - once you start the pass/aggressive shit, it's bc you can't stand them anymore, they're under your skin and you can't even give them the time of day to their face so you do that passive stuff -- basically you have no respect and probabaly could care less what they think of you in the end... whereas I find I can be direct w folks I actually care about - and take the time to 'hug it out bitch'
Richard said…
Wow, I'm glad I checked this out. I thought nobody read this stuff!

I think you're opinion is great. Interestingly I find that I have a hard time dealing with people who are passive-aggressive and I tend to respond in kind which I find exhausting.

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